challenge

Small Town (The Rewrite) — Friday Fictioneers July 20

/ JoHawkTheWriter / 2 Comments

Title: Small Town
Source:  Friday Fictioneers sponsored by Rochelle Wisoff-Fields-Addicted to Purple
Word count: 100 words

PHOTO PROMPT © Dale Rogerson

This is a story I posted a few days ago for Friday Fictioneers. One of the comments suggested it might have more impact if written in the present simple.  So here is both the original and the rewrite. Let me know which version you like better.

The Original Story
Moist sheets clung to my body. The sun beat on me trying to turn my bruises lobster red. The oscillating fan set on high evaporated the perspiration and raised goosebumps as the artificial breeze swept across my body. I closed my eyes, tired of the heat, tired of this small town and the smaller minds that lived here. Small townspeople talked about everyone’s business and buried their secrets deep. I hid my secret well, so they would never guess why I left. I pulled the drapes across the window. Neither the sun nor that man would beat on me again.

The Rewritten Story
Moist sheets cling to my body. The sun beats on me trying to turn my bruises lobster red. The oscillating fan set on high evaporates the perspiration and raises goosebumps as the artificial breeze sweeps across my body. I close my eyes, tired of the heat, tired of this small town and the smaller minds that live here. Small townspeople talk about everyone’s business and bury their secrets deep. I hide my secret well, so they will never guess why I left. I pull the drapes across the window. Neither the sun nor that man will beat on me again.

__________________________________________

Keep on writing.

Jo Hawk The Writer

Simon Says — 3 Line Tales Week 129

/ JoHawkTheWriter / 7 Comments

From Sonya’s 3LineTales at Only100Words.
You can find the original prompt here. Thank you, Sonya.

photo by Alex Knight via Unsplash

Simon was super cute, highly efficient and he learned everything about me.
I didn’t have to worry about cleaning or cooking or a hundred other minor things.
My life was arranged, tidy, sterile and devoid of any spontaneity.

______________________

Keep on writing.

Jo Hawk The Writer

Small Town — Friday Fictioneers July 20

/ JoHawkTheWriter / 20 Comments

Title: Small Town
Source:  Friday Fictioneers sponsored by Rochelle Wisoff-Fields-Addicted to Purple
Word count: 100 words

PHOTO PROMPT © Dale Rogerson

Moist sheets clung to my body. The sun beat on me trying to turn my bruises lobster red. The oscillating fan set on high evaporated the perspiration and raised goosebumps as the artificial breeze swept across my body. I closed my eyes, tired of the heat, tired of this small town and the smaller minds that lived here. Small townspeople talked about everyone’s business and buried their secrets deep. I hid my secret well, so they would never guess why I left. I pulled the drapes across the window. Neither the sun nor that man would beat on me again.

__________________________________________

Keep on writing.

Jo Hawk The Writer

Hoorah — 100 WW Week 80

/ JoHawkTheWriter / 2 Comments

Title:  Hoorah
Source:  100 Word Wednesday: Week 80
Word count: 100 words

Image by Bikurgurl

 

David wanted one thing in life.  Well, two if you counted Kerry. This weekend’s graduation ceremony was one step towards attaining his first desire. He hadn’t expected training to be easy, those lessons he learned early from his dad. Training had gotten harder when his dad died because he depended on his mentor. Becoming a Marine would have made his dad proud, and that was David’s main goal.  A small box burned a hole in his pocket and he thought of Kerry. He planned to propose today. If she agreed, they would marry in the small chapel before he deployed.

__________________________________________

Keep on writing.

Jo Hawk The Writer

High Seas – FFfPP Week 29

/ JoHawkTheWriter / 6 Comments

Title:  High Seas
Source:  FLASH FICTION FOR THE PURPOSEFUL PRACTITIONER- 2018 WEEK #28
Word count:  176 words

white-ship-traveling-through-vast-body-of-water-with-white-birds-flying-beside-879479 Pixel Photo

The ferry scheduled two trips a day to the island. Today, reports showed a storm with the island in its direct path. Computer projections called for rough seas, so no ferry service would be possible for two days. Based on radar Logan expected six missed trips. He plotted and considered everything that might happen. Logan needed a window when everyone would be busy with the storm. He calculated how long the Islanders would be worried about their own safety.

He built his house at the island’s highest point and dug the foundations deep underground. It was hurricane proof and ran off the grid. But Logan didn’t plan to be at his house during the storm. It started six months ago with weird things happening. Signs showed they were getting close, and he realized he had waited too long.

The storm passed leaving the island in turmoil and people even more worried.  The island sheriff was busy and he called for help from the mainland. Three homicides and two missing persons were more than his office could handle.

__________________________________________

Keep on writing.

Jo Hawk The Writer

Conspiracy — FFfAW Challenge – 174

/ JoHawkTheWriter / 12 Comments

Title:  Conspiracy
Source: Flash Fiction for Aspiring Writers
Word count:   155 words

I tell no one how I became the mistress of the Marchese Di Felecia. Or rather, I never tell them the truth. The truth is a series of coincidences that when put together seem unbelievable. If I hadn’t lived it, I wouldn’t believe it either. Being the Marchese’s mistress is why I am on the street today. I am the keeper of secrets, both my own and others. They are my power base and one reason the Marchese loves me. I pull the coarse scarf closer around my face, hoping to remain invisible. I do not knock at the blue door, but enter and head upstairs where my mother waits.

“Is the Marchesa with us?” she asks.

“Yes, my half-sister received the messages.  When the Marchese’s forces attack, our father will die. With no male heir, his territory will pass to the Marchese.”

“Does she suspect?”

“No Mother, and we need her alive.”

“For now.”

__________________________________________

Keep on writing.

Jo Hawk The Writer

Eldorado –3 Line Tales, Week 128

/ JoHawkTheWriter

From Sonya’s 3LineTales at Only100Words.
You can find the original prompt here. Thank you, Sonya.

photo by Sharon McCutcheon via Skillshare

The quest for Eldorado worn for all to see with destiny a foregone realization.
Hypnotized by lust for gold and glitter, desire soon became her master.
Weary worn the quest lead home to the dark wave Shadow Valley.

______________________
Keep on writing.
Jo Hawk The Writer

Childish Antics — Friday Fictioneers July 13

/ JoHawkTheWriter / 6 Comments

Title: Childish Antics
Source:  Friday Fictioneers sponsored by Rochelle Wisoff-Fields-Addicted to Purple
Word count: 100 words

PHOTO PROMPT © Liz Young

Dale fumbled with his backpack and the tumbler of hot coffee as he tried to lock the front door while the agenda for the day scrolled through his head. He turned and stopped dead in his tracks.

“What the hell?”

Dale stared at the masked man wearing a blood-stained lab coat, locked in a roller cage wrapped in crime scene tape and Halloween cobwebs.

“Bobby?”

The masked man nodded.

“Isn’t it a little early for Halloween?”

This time his head shook.

“You okay?”

Another nod answered him.

“Great cause I don’t have time for your antics. I’m late for work.”

 

__________________________________________

Keep on writing.

Jo Hawk The Writer

Gut Instinct – FFfPP 28

/ JoHawkTheWriter / 2 Comments

Title:  Gut Instinct
Source:  FLASH FICTION FOR THE PURPOSEFUL PRACTITIONER- 2018 WEEK #28
Word count:  200 words

flight-airport-airplane-plane-34631 pixel photo

Kate boarded the plane, first one on, aisle seat behind first class. It gave her the opportunity to view the passengers as they boarded. Two caught her attention, a man Caucasian approximately sixty and a woman mid-twenties, Asian. The woman seemed groggy. Kate speculated it was drugs. They took their seats, row eight. The woman sat next to the window and soon fell asleep.

She waited until they were in the air to check with the flight attendant. The names she gave Kate came back clean when she keyed them into her laptop. Kate didn’t buy it, so she grabbed her cell phone and snapped two pictures on her way to the bathroom. Facial recognition software gave her an answer, and she notified the authorities in Rome.

Nine hours later, Kate shadowed them as they entered the terminal. She nodded, and the officers of the Guardia di Finanza set up to intercept the pair. The report Kate read stated the woman had disappeared three weeks ago from her job in the IT department of a Swiss bank. They suspected the man of multiple counts of money laundering and international bank fraud. His bags contained enough evidence to guarantee a conviction.
__________________________________________

Keep on writing.

Jo Hawk The Writer

Legacy — 100WW 79

/ JoHawkTheWriter / 2 Comments

Title:  Legacy
Source:  100 Word Wednesday: Week 79
Word count: 100 words

Image by Bikurgurl

Meg’s obsession began when she was a little girl. Her grandma had made clothes for Meg from the time she was a baby. She taught Meg how to sew clothes and blankets for her dolls. Meg loved the times they sewed together. She cherished those memories.

Those were the memories she wanted to recreate and the reason she opened her shop. Once a month she held free classes for young girls, recruiting her friends to help. These days they made cell and tablet covers and cosmetic bags, but that didn’t matter. The girls and their mentors were making lifelong friends.

__________________________________________

Keep on writing.

Jo Hawk The Writer