Many people keep daily gratitude journals, and they swear by the wonderful changes they attribute to the exercise. Studies suggest the practice makes us healthier, increases happiness, improves sleep, and strengthens positive emotions, along with a host of other perks. But no matter how hard I tried — I could never make this a habit.

The reason finally dawned on me. For me, gratitude creates a negative gut reaction. Weird, right?  Let me explain. It feels like writing the obligatory thank you note for the ugly Christmas sweater or the jacket in a color you hate and is two sizes too big. Being grateful also signals a comparison to a period of inadequacy and produces anxiety about the future. For example, I might be thankful for a bonus that lets me repay a debt. Gratitude recalls the past inability to pay the bill and questions your ability to make subsequent payments.

I needed something rooted in the present, and that realization moved me toward appreciation. Appreciation is the “ah” of sinking into a warm bubble bath at the end of a long, stressful day. Appreciation is living in the now, and it requires me to acknowledge the moment. I experience an overwhelming sense of wellbeing as I sip my morning coffee, listen to the birds sing, and revel in the grandeur of a sunrise. Fear, comparisons, and judgment don’t exist. Appreciation benefits my soul.

Do you keep a journal?

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Keep on writing.

Jo Hawk The Writer

This week has been a whirlwind. How is it already Saturday? When I last checked my calendar, it was Tuesday. As a home office entrepreneur, I wear many hats. My days fill themselves with content creation, staff meetings, market research, phone calls, financial reporting, and managing my never-ending emails. My eighty-hour workweek is alive and well. Eliminating the dreaded daily commute also removes any opportunity to get away from the job. And it’s far too easy to always be on call, accessible, and open for business.

However, allowing the career to leak into non-work time means other duties slide. We neglect evenings when we should rest, relax, and enjoy family interactions, and we defer basic chores. Suddenly, Saturday, the ultimate flex day filled with unallocated hours designed to prevent a week’s worth of overload, is overbooked. My to-do list cuts into vital activities like sleeping late, watching movies, getting the house clean, and carving out a chance to do nothing. Packing all that into one weekend is enough to stress me out.

Crazy, intense, demanding calendars are my life, but I need to have fun. A lot of fun. And I hate missing spontaneous events because my agenda owns me.  The only way to preserve my precious buffer is to prioritize by saying no to some tasks. No second-guessing allowed. By giving myself a cushion, I gain flexibility and I reduce my stress.

Are your Saturdays your catch-up day?

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Keep on writing.

Jo Hawk The Writer

A classical definition of tinkering paints a picture of unskillful and clumsy effort, performed with makeshift objects, that yields less than satisfactory results. But I prefer an updated concept where tinkering explains an exploration of materials. The aim is to understand the capabilities, properties, positive attributes, and limitations of the individual components. It is an unstructured, hands-on experience that allows the tinker to think in innovative ways to discover novel solutions to current problems.

As a writer, tinkering intrigues me. Writing is difficult, but I believe there is value in a purposeful fiddling with your work. Perhaps you lift a single phrase from your draft and play with the wording and the order. You can eliminate words, mold, and shape the content until it no longer resembles the original line. Hitting on a perfectly crafted sentence is not the desired outcome. The joy is in playing and experimenting with the text.

Writers worry about the structure of sentences, scenes, chapters, and the overall story. Storyboards, post-it notes, random thoughts scribbled on a napkin, and outlines help us rewrite, rearrange, and reformat the work. It is like an architect constructing a skyscraper by laying a firm foundation, finding unexpected building materials, and re-imaging how to use bricks, cement blocks, or concrete. It introduces risk into the creation process but facing the unknown can lead to startling discoveries.

Are you tinkering with your story?

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Keep on writing.

Jo Hawk The Writer

Obstacles often feel insurmountable. They present themselves at inopportune times and make us question everything. Why is this so difficult? What was I thinking? How does anyone do this? Maybe I should quit. They say, if achieving goals were easy, everyone would do it.

This year’s opening salvo stopped me in my tracks. The external challenges were daunting. I realized they are outside of my control, and I ignore them at my peril. There is nowhere to run, nowhere to hide. Just when I assumed I was ready for my grand adventure, they blindsided me. But I refuse to entertain defeat. I went back to the drawing board and reassessed how those external obstacles changed my internal obstacles. This was important since these are issues over which I have total command. I also rearranged my daily routines, making appropriate adjustments. Habits are wonderful when they move you toward your goal. But they can foster highly destructive activities and inhibit forward motion.

I have been here before, and I learned that hidden within every obstacle is an opportunity. I expect unexpected roadblocks. They signal I am on the right path. They are the barriers to test my resolve, my commitment to my stated target, and my wiliness to pay the price of admission. The larger and more demanding the mountain is to climb, the richer the reward. It has taken time to strategize and develop an alternative plan, but I am once again excited about what lies ahead.

Have you adjusted your plans to attain your goals?

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Keep on writing.

Jo Hawk The Writer

I have been experiencing an interesting phenomenon. I’ve recently added a time-consuming project to my agenda, which entails going through completed pieces. My goal is editing, revising, or rewriting them. I wrote some tales over two years ago. That doesn’t sound odd, does it? It is a well document fact that writers often create first drafts, then second, third, and sometimes four or more revisions.

My normal writing process for shorter articles is to write the story quickly, then let the piece sit for a few days. After our cooling-off period, I edit, condense, refine, and polish my work until I am satisfied. I submit a few lucky examples to my critique group. After careful consideration, I incorporate or ignore any comments as appropriate and complete one last review. Stories not sent for criticism sometimes find their way onto my blog. Everything is cataloged and filed on my hard drive, which is subject to frequent backup procedures.

The weird part has been discovering many files contain yarns I have no memory of creating. Zip. Zero. Nada. Anyone could claim to be the author, except they live on my computer, and I am noted at the file’s creator. Reading my forgotten words with a novice’s eyes is a unique experience. Somehow, they no longer belong to me. The undertaking hits with opportune timing, as I realize they have earned their freedom, and need to be released to the wild.

Do you forget the words you have written?

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Keep on writing.

Jo Hawk The Writer